2NOTES“You broke your other appointment$$$ didn’t you?”“I did not! I told you on the phone—these people canceled at the last minute—”“Oh$$$ Geo dear$$$ come off it! You know$$$ I sometimes think$$$ about you$$$ whenever you do something really sweet$$$ you’re ashamed of it afterwords! You knew jolly well how badly I needed you tonight$$$ so you broke that appointment. I could tell you were fibbing$$$ the minute you opened your mouth! You and I can’t pull the wool over each other’s eyes. I found that out$$$ long ago.

No$$$ Geo—underneath all that$$$ Nan really loves me. It’s just she wants me to see things her way. You know$$$ she’s two years older; that meant a lot when we were children. I’ve always thought of her as being sort of like a road—I mean$$$ she leads somewhere. With her$$$ I’ll never lose my way.

I certainly should have$$$' he agrees$$$ smiling and thinking what an absurd and universally-accepted bit of nonsense it is$$$ that your best friends must necessarily be the ones who best understand you. As if there weren't far too much understanding in the world already; above all$$$ that understanding between lovers$$$ celebrated in song and story$$$ which is actually such torture that no two of them can bear it without frequent separations or fights.

What’s so phony nowadays is all this familiarity. Pretending there isn’t any difference between people —well$$$ like you were saying about minorities$$$ this morning. If you and I are no different$$$ what do we have to give each other? How can we ever be friends?

...all around George$$$ approaching him$$$ crossing his path from every direction$$$ is the male and female raw material which is fed daily into this factory$$$ along the conveyor-belts of the freeways$$$ to be processed$$$ packaged and placed on the market...What do they think they are up to? Well$$$ there is the official answer; preparing themselves for life which means a job and security in which to raise children to prepare themselves for life which means a job and security in which...Here$$$ in their midst$$$ George feels a sort of vertigo. Oh God$$$ what will become of them all?

The prefect evening...lying down on the couch beside the bookcase and reading himself sleepy...Jim lying opposite him at the other end of the couch$$$ also reading; the two of them absorbed in their books yet so completely aware of each other's presence.

But now isn’t simply now. Now is also a cold reminder: one whole day later than yesterday$$$ one year later than last year. Every now is labeled with its date$$$ rendering all past nows obsolete$$$ until — later of sooner — perhaps — no$$$ not perhaps — quite certainly: it will come.

As they embrace$$$ she kisses him full on the mouth. And suddenly sticks her tongue right in. She has done this before$$$ often. It’s one of those drunken long shots which just might$$$ at least theoretically$$$ once in ten thousand tries$$$ throw a relationship right out of its orbit and send it whizzing off on another. Do women ever stop trying? No. But$$$ because they never stop$$$ they learn to be good losers.

If it’s going to be a world with no time for sentiment$$$ it’s not a world that I want to live in.

Think of two people$$$ living together day after day$$$ year after year$$$ in this small space$$$ standing elbow to elbow cooking at the same small stove$$$ squeezing past each other on the narrow stairs$$$ shaving in front of the same small bathroom mirror$$$ constantly jogging$$$ jostling$$$ bumping against each other’s bodies by mistake or on purpose$$$ sensually$$$ aggressively$$$ awkwardly$$$ impatiently$$$ in rage or in love – think what deep though invisible tracks they must leave$$$ everywhere$$$ behind them!