Success is a great deodorant.

Conversation: A fair for the display of the minor mental commodities$$$ each exhibitor being too intent upon the arrangement of his own wares to observe those of his neighbor.

Fear has no brains; it is an idiot. The dismal witness that it bears and the cowardly counsel that it whispers are unrelated.

Cabbage: A familiar kitchen-garden vegetable about as large and wise as a man's head.

Friendship: A ship big enough for two in fair weather$$$ but only one in foul.

Belladonna: In Italian a beautiful lady; in English a deadly poison. A striking example of the essential identity of the two tongues.

Dawn: When men of reason go to bed.

Christian: One who believes that the New Testament is a divinely inspired book admirably suited to the spiritual needs of his neighbor.

No one loves the messenger who brings bad news.

Heathen: A benighted creature who has the folly to worship something he can see and feel.