I had now reached that phase of the disorder where all sense of hope had vanished$$$ along with the idea of a futurity; my brain$$$ in thrall to its outlaw hormones$$$ had become less an organ of thought than an instrument registering$$$ minute by minute$

I had now reached that phase of the disorder where all sense of hope had vanished$$$ along with the idea of a futurity; my brain$$$ in thrall to its outlaw hormones$$$ had become less an organ of thought than an instrument registering$$$ minute by minute$$$ varying degrees of its own suffering.