Grapeshot: An argument which the future is preparing in answer to the demands of American Socialism.

It has been observed that one's nose is never so happy as when thrust into the affairs of others from which some physiologists have drawn the inference that the nose is devoid of the sense of smell.

Painting: The art of protecting flat surfaces from the weather and exposing them to the critic.

History: An account mostly false$$$ of events unimportant$$$ which are brought about by rulers mostly knaves$$$ and soldiers mostly fools.

Fidelity: A virtue peculiar to those who are about to be betrayed.

Never seek to tell thy love; Love that never told can be. For the gentle wind does move silently.. invisibly.

Homicide: The slaying of one human being by another. There arefour kinds of homicide: felonious$$$ excusable$$$ justifiable$$$ and praise worthy$$$ but it makes no great difference to the person slain whether he fell by one kind or another — the classification is for advantage of the lawyers.

Egotist: A person of low taste$$$ more interested in himself than in me.

Learn the lesson that$$$ if you are to do the work of a prophet$$$ what you need is not a sceptre but a hoe.

What I know of the divine science and holy scripture$$$ I learnt in the woods and fields.